Relaxation

Relaxation is about intentionally calming your body to help ease tension, anxiety, and stress. When you’re under pressure, your body’s fight-or-flight response kicks in. Your heart races, muscles tighten, and breathing becomes quick and shallow. Physical relaxation techniques do the opposite: they trigger the “relaxation response,” a state of calm in which your breathing and heart rate slow down, blood pressure lowers, and your muscles loosen. This brings your body back into balance and tells your brain that it’s okay to let go of worry. The result is often a sense of relief and peace spreading through you, both physically and mentally.

It’s important to note that relaxation is an active process, not just vegging out in front of the TV. While watching a movie or scrolling your phone might feel “restful,” it usually doesn’t release muscle tension or truly reset your nervous system. Intentional relaxation exercises, on the other hand, directly engage your body’s calming mechanisms.

Below are some of the most common relaxation strategies and tips on how to do them. You can try a combination and see what you like best. Remember, the goal is to reduce muscle tension and slow your breathing. As you explore, approach the techniques with a gentle attitude. There’s no “perfect” way to relax and no technique that’s best for everyone. Over time, you’ll become more familiar with how calm feels in your body, and it will get easier to get there. Let’s look at a few techniques:

When we’re stressed, breathing tends to become rapid and shallow (often just in the chest). Deep breathing reverses that by using your diaphragm (a muscle under your lungs) so that you breathe deeply into your belly. This sends a message to your nervous system to slow down. You can do this sitting, standing, or lying down.

To practice, start by loosening any tight clothing and get comfortable. Then try this breathing exercise:

1. Breathe in slowly through your nose to a count of about 4. Imagine filling your belly with air like a balloon.
2. Hold your breath for a brief moment to a count of about 2 or 4.
3. Breathe out slowly through your mouth for a count of 4, feeling your belly gently fall.
4. Hold your breath for a brief moment to a count of about 2 or 4.

Repeat this cycle for a few minutes, keeping the counts even.

Some people like to visualize a square or box to pace their breathing (“inhale, two, three, four… hold, two, three, four… exhale, two, three, four… hold, two, three, four…” and so on). This is often called “box breathing.”

If a 4-count feels too long, you can do 3 or whatever is comfortable - the key is a slow, steady rhythm. As you breathe, try to focus your mind on the breath itself. Feel the air moving in through your nose, then the gentle whoosh as it leaves your mouth.

You might notice your heart rate slowing after a little while. Deep breathing is great because you can use it anytime, anywhere - in a tense meeting, stuck in traffic, or whenever you catch yourself starting to stress. Even a single deep breath can serve as a mini-reset during a busy day.

Progressive muscle relaxation is a technique that targets the physical tension. The idea is to work through different muscle groups one by one, first tensing each muscle for a few seconds and then deliberately releasing it. By tightening the muscle and then letting go, you heighten your awareness of what relaxation feels like, and you help that area of the body truly unclench.

1. Find a quiet spot and sit or lie down in a comfortable position.
2. Start at one end of your body, for example your feet. Curl your toes and tense the muscles of your feet - not so hard that you hurt yourself, just enough to feel a good squeeze.
3. Hold the tension for about 5 seconds while you breathe in. Notice the feeling of tightness.
4. Exhale and fully release the tension in your feet. Let them go completely limp, and pay attention to the new feeling - a warmth or lightness as the relaxation spreads.
5. Move up to your lower legs (calves). Tighten them by pointing your toes or flexing your feet, hold briefly, then breathe out and release.

Continue this process through each major muscle group, working your way up: your thighs, hips and buttocks, abdomen and chest, hands, arms, shoulders, neck, and finally your face.

Take it slow, and keep breathing deeply as you go. While releasing each muscle, it can help to imagine stress or tension “melting” out of that area. You might picture the tightness as ice that is warming and turning into water, dripping away, or you might simply focus on how nice it feels for that part of your body to be loose and relaxed.

After you’ve gone through all the muscle groups, spend a moment enjoying the sensation of your whole body being more at ease. It can feel like a gentle wave of relaxation flowing from your toes to your head. Many people find PMR not only calms them down, but also improves their sleep if done before bedtime.

If you have any injuries or areas that hurt, skip those areas or be extra gentle with them. The point is to teach your body the difference between tension and relaxation. With regular practice, you’ll become quicker at noticing when you’re inadvertently tensing up so you can consciously let go.

If you find it hard to work through all muscles on your own, you can look for a guided audio for progressive muscle relaxation. Many free recordings are available to talk you through the sequence, which can be very helpful while you’re learning the technique.

Have you ever daydreamed about being on a beach or another serene place to “get away” from the stress around you? Visualization builds on that idea. It’s a relaxation technique where you use your imagination to create a calming scene in your mind, so your body and emotions can follow.

The mind and body are connected, so if you vividly imagine yourself in a peaceful, safe environment, your body can actually start to relax as though you are there. This is a form of mental escape that can be very soothing. It’s especially useful if racing thoughts or worries are contributing to your anxiety. By giving your mind something gentle and positive to focus on, it can crowd out the stressful thoughts for a while and let you reset.

1. Find a quiet, comfortable spot and close your eyes.
2. Take a few slow breaths to begin.
3. Picture a place that feels relaxing to you personally. It could be a real location you love or an imaginary fantasy spot. There’s no wrong answer - it should be someplace you find peaceful, safe, and pleasant.
4. Once you have it in mind, immerse yourself in that scene. Engage all your senses: what do you see around you? what do you hear? can you feel anything on your skin, like a soft breeze or warm sunlight? are there any smells, like fresh pine from the forest or salty sea air? You can even imagine a taste if it fits. The more vividly you paint this mental picture, the more your mind will buy into it and relax.
5. Stay in your imagined scene for a few minutes. Let yourself simply be present there, enjoying the calm.
6. If distracting thoughts pop up (which is totally normal), gently guide your attention back to your peaceful imagery. Think of it like refocusing a camera on the beautiful scene, letting the random thoughts fade into the background. You might find your body responding by loosening up and your mood becoming calmer, just as if you had taken a mini-vacation.
7. When you’re ready, take a nice deep breath and bring yourself back to your real surroundings, feeling more relaxed than before.

Visualization can be done on your own (once you have practiced, you’ll have a “library” of favorite calming scenes to revisit), with the help of a guided imagery recording, or or app, where someone narrates a relaxing scenario for you. Some people love having a narrator walk them through, while others prefer doing it themselves - use whichever works best.

This technique is very personal. For example, a mountain cabin might relax one person but bore another who prefers the ocean. So feel free to experiment with different imagery until you find what scenarios give you the most comfort.

During a body scan you systematically sweep your attention through the body, part by part, and simply notice whatever physical sensations are present without judgment. This practice anchors you firmly in the present moment, helps you develop a more intimate and accepting relationship with your body, and can help dissolve areas of tension simply by bringing gentle, non-judgmental awareness to them.

1. Lie comfortably on your back, with your arms resting by your sides and your legs uncrossed. Allow your eyes to gently close. Begin by bringing your attention to the natural rhythm of your breath, noticing the gentle rise and fall of your abdomen without trying to change it.

2. Bring your awareness to the toes of your left foot. Simply notice any sensations that are present here - tingling, warmth, coolness, pressure, or maybe no particular sensation at all. Whatever you find is okay. There is no need to judge it or change it. You are just noticing.

3. Slowly (as if you are moving a gentle spotlight of awareness) begin to scan up your body. Move from your toes to the sole of your left foot, your heel, your ankle. Continue up to your lower leg, your knee, and your thigh. Then, shift your attention to the toes of your right foot and repeat the process, slowly scanning all the way up your right leg.

4. Continue up the torso and arms. Bring your awareness to your pelvis, your lower back, and your abdomen. Continue scanning up through your chest and upper back. Then, bring your attention to your fingertips and scan up through your hands, wrists, and arms to your shoulders.

5. Move your awareness to your neck and throat, and finally, scan through your face (your jaw, mouth, cheeks, eyes, and forehead) and over the top of your head.

6. As you scan, your mind will inevitably wander. This is normal and expected. When you notice your mind has drifted, gently and without criticism, acknowledge where it went and then guide it back to the part of the body you are focusing on. If you encounter areas of tension or discomfort, simply acknowledge them. You may imagine your breath flowing into and out of that area, bringing it a sense of softness and space.

7. To conclude, expand your awareness to encompass your entire body as a whole. Feel your body as a single field of sensation, breathing. Rest in this state of open, gentle awareness for a few moments before slowly bringing your attention back to the room.

As with the previous exercises, you can do this on your own or with the help of a guided recording. It’s also possible to combine it with visualization by starting with imagining yourself in a calming scene and then doing the scan.

For many, gentle physical movement is an excellent way to release tension and quiet the mind. Practices like yoga, tai chi, and qigong combine slow, flowing movements with deep breathing and mindfulness. They are often described as moving meditations. These activities help relax your muscles and joints through stretching and rhythm, while also focusing your mind on the present movement rather than on worries.

For example, in yoga you might do a series of poses, paying attention to your inhale as you stretch upward and your exhale as you fold forward. In tai chi, you perform continuous slow motions, coordinating with your breath and maintaining a soft focus.

If you tend to feel too restless to sit and do breathing exercises, an active relaxation approach might suit you better. Joining a yoga or tai chi class can introduce you to the basics.

Even a simple practice of stretching at home can help. For instance, doing shoulder rolls, neck stretches, or leg stretches while breathing deeply can release tightness. Walking can also be relaxing if done at a comfortable pace - some people do “walking meditation” where they walk slowly in a quiet place, paying attention to each step and breath. The key with movement-based relaxation is to move mindfully and without strain. Unlike a strenuous workout, the goal here isn’t to get your heart rate up or break a sweat, but rather to gently loosen the body.

Other forms of movement like dance or swimming could also be relaxing for some, especially if you do them in a leisurely, enjoyable way. For example, leisurely swimming laps while focusing on the sensation of the water can be meditative.

The best part about using movement for relaxation is that it doubles as light exercise, which in itself can improve mood and reduce anxiety. Just be sure to pick activities that you find enjoyable and calming. As always, listen to your body. The movements should feel comfortable and pleasant. If you have any health conditions, you might check with a doctor or instructor about which movements are safe for you.

Soothing Activities

Engage in simple calming activities that release physical tension. For example:

• Take a warm bath or shower. Warm water can help your muscles relax. You can imagine stress washing off you and down the drain.
• Listen to calming music while lying down with your eyes closed. Music can slow your heart rate and distract from anxious thoughts.
• Use aromatherapy. Scents like lavender or chamomile (through essential oils, candles, or tea) can promote relaxation for some people.
• Curling up with a cozy blanket and a cup of herbal tea can be a relaxing ritual for bedtime.

Massage or Self-Massage

Physical touch and massage can work wonders for tight muscles. You can gently massage your own neck, shoulders, or temples to knead out tension. If you have the opportunity, a professional massage therapy session can deeply relax your body. But even a few minutes of rubbing the stiffness out of your shoulders at your desk can help you reset.

Breathing Breaks

Don’t wait for stress to skyrocket before you use these tools. Build short “breathing breaks” or stretch breaks into your day. For instance, you might take 2 minutes every hour to step away from what you’re doing and do some slow breaths or a quick body scan for tension. These small pauses can prevent stress from accumulating.